Tuesday, 15 April 2014

Slut-Shaming.

"Slut-Shaming; Slut shaming is a concept in sexuality. It is a neologism used to describe the act of making any person feel guilty or inferior for certain sexual behaviors or desires that deviate from traditional or orthodox gender expectations, or that which may be considered to be contrary to natural or religious law. Some examples of behaviors over which women are said to be "slut-shamed" include: violating accepted dress codes by dressing in sexually provocative ways, requesting access to birth control,having premarital or casual sex, or being raped or sexually assaulted."

This is quite a different post for me today. If anything, it's a bit of a rant. A few little comments from people recently set me off and I figured what better place to have a bit of rant and get everything off my chest than right here on my blog? 

I have plans to go out with friends tomorrow; we plan on going to the beach, then to do some shopping and then maybe to the cinema. I was having a bit of a fashion crisis and couldn't decide what to wear. I was stuck between two outfits so was in the middle of sending some photos to a friend when my Mum arrived home. I asked her opinion and when she saw me in one of the outfits (a playsuit and a denim jacket), she said there was no way I was leaving the house dressed like such a tart, and told me that I was dressed in both a provocative and disrespectful manner. The playsuit was actually longer than shorts I usually leave the house in, and is an item of clothing that I have worn plenty of times before, so I was left nothing short (pun not intended!) than utterly shocked at her comment. She told me that it is for my own good and that boys will have all sorts of things going through their head. I am still fuming about what she said. 

Is it girls' fault that boys can't control themselves around us the minute we show a bit of leg? God forbid that we decide to show off a part of the body that boys too have. Do we have a full on meltdown and a good ogle every time a boy in shorts walks past? No. It's perfectly reasonable for boys to walk around topless and with their boxers showing but should a female choose to walk around in a bikini top and some shorts, all hell would break lose! With us now being in 2014, you'd think that this whole criteria wouldn't exist and that everyone would be free to dress exactly as they please but no, it seems to be only getting worse. After all, we live in a World where people can't even marry whomever they want, let alone dress how they want so I guess I shouldn't even be surprised.

It is becoming more and more common for men to rape women and to blame it on the way they were dressed or because they were showing too much skin. I don't see women jumping on any men at any given chance just because they are wearing shorts. What do people want us to do? Walk around covered from head to toe? But then surely it's only far for men to do that too... Oh wait, I forgot that we live in a World when men and women still do not have equal rights. My bad.

This rant may seem a bit over the top considering it was all triggered from a comment from my own Mother but it was still hurtful to hear and really got me thinking that, if my own Mother would say that, what would other people be thinking?

One thing's for sure, I am now 100% certain that there is nothing I hate more than people who judge others on how they dress and who try and makes others feel less confident or more guilty about themselves just because of what they want and how they think in life.

What do you all think of this and the topic of slut-shaming? 
Let me know in the comments below, as I'd be interested to hear your views!

-I said 'and' far too much in this post, haha. Sorry for it being a bit rambly-